1. Gratitude is the most transformative force in the cosmos, because gratitude is love. "When our hearts are broken, we don't think we have much to be thankful for. We don't have to be smiling when we say 'Thank you.'" 2. Your happiness increases the happiness of everyone who knows you. "We have so much. All we have is all we need. All we need is the awareness of how blessed we really are."3. Whether we live passionately or not is a choice we make. When writers write, the most important emotion is conveyed between the lines. "I want to live in between the lines, where the depth is." 4. Those who live passionately teach us how to love. Those who love passionately teach us how to live. 5. Big changes come with small choices. "Little changes [and] little choices add up to be revolutionary changes in your life."
6. The more risks you take, the luckier you become. 7. Nothing hurts you more than your expectations. "If you trust life and learn to embrace it and try not to control everything, then life can be more wondrous than you thought it would be." 8. Our relationships with others are only as emotionally healthy, happy, holy and content as our relationships with ourselves. 9. The only wound your soul never recovers from is regret. "What I know for sure is that we don't have the luxury of regret any more. The past only asks to be remembered." 10. Cherish each morning and give thanks for each evening. - Sarah Ban Breathnach
i really love my friends. we have done seemingly everything together, if not as a whole group, then as fragments of the group. we've gone grunion-running (failed attempt, no less fun), partied in Vegas, recorded original or covered songs, played at various amusement parks, made the white people stare in Arizona, rode a party bus to Hollywood, trespassed private properties, accompanied each other to potentially boring/awkward/rapist situations, discussed life at the top-of-the-world, discussed life everywhere else, aimless drives, countless shows, sleepovers like brothers and sisters and soulmates and spooners, and the list goes on for days.we took our experiences to yet another level this past week. about 18 of us were present for Mrs. Honrado's funeral service. that's a fairly large number considering the fact that it was 1PM on a Tuesday, when most people would be at work or school. i know for a fact that at least 4 or 5 of us did skip work to be there. i also know that a lot of people really couldn't make it, but they were very well aware of everything that was happening and sent their deepest condolences and prayers. it was naturally a very sad afternoon, yet i couldn't help but feel uplifted by the love of my friends. we truly, truly from the depth of our hearts, care for each other. even though we all bicker at times, a little drama here and there, bruised egos and whatnot, we will still be there for each other at the end of the day. i have always felt that this family we have here is unlike 99% of any other (beyond the fact that there's like 50 of us, and we'd go everywhere together). when we all started hanging out 3 years ago, we were immediately drawn to each others' personalities and interests. we would hang out every single night of the summer, and every single weekend when it wasn't summer. oh, the plans we made and the adventures we had. we always tried to outdo our previous events and added little twists to the nightly fun. remember Cage Match night? ha, that was the night i fell and left my knee with a heart-shaped scab (which i ended up showing EVERYONE because i thought it was so cool, and also because i was drunk). that seriously feels like 10 years ago. there were the people who came and went, friends of friends, but we would always maintain a very large and amazing group in and of ourselves. there was no place we could go where we didn't demand the attention of the entire room/vicinity. the sad thing was, we all predicted that it wouldn't last. nothing this good could ever be forever. i'm really not sure if we were right or wrong, although i must say, it is quite rare to get the entire group together nowadays. now, it has to take a birthday or a big party or something really special to get everyone's attention. back in the day, one person would call you to go to someone's house, and when you showed up, everyone else would be there too. it wouldn't take anything more.times have changed, but no one is to blame. we've all grown 3 years older and now we have more priorities that trump hanging out. people naturally and inevitably drift apart. we've also divided into different cliques, some very natural, and others intentional. people have shown their true colors, and we are no longer innocent. it is now time to stick to those we feel the closest to, because the others would be elsewhere. but looking past all of that, i believe we still love one another like brothers and sisters, even if there is division. maybe some people are just step-brothers and step-sisters :)i guess what i have to say is, even though we don't spend time all together as often as we used to, we are still a happy family. the love and support within this group is and always will be the glue that holds us together, even when we are apart. i really miss the old days when we were still innocent, still oblivious to the fact that certain people would just not get along with each other, or that a "family member" could betray you (even after all the time, heart, and money you'd invested in your friendship). i miss the days when we'd just get intoxicated all the time, all the while knowing that we weren't really there for the alcohol. simpler days are behind us. we're still doing good. 3 years.and hopefully many, many more.i can't wait for the weddings, babies, first homes, and other milestones in the years ahead. <3
i had the most amazing Saturday night. the entire night consisted of mostly people i'd never met, so it was quite refreshing. plus, there was no tension between different cliques. everyone was just out to have a great night and to celebrate our beloved Paul's birthday. dinner at BJ's (where else?) and after-party = funnest shit ever.Paul has the most interesting network of friends, i must say. everyone was so good-looking, friendly, and generous with compliments! they flattered me to bits & pieces. i'm still glowing. oh yes, and it was my first time taking jello shots. i didn't even know what those were before then. i had to use my fingers. such a n00b.haha i'm wayyy too used to just downing beer or doing shooters with the fam (which has what, like 90% guys?). i'd almost forgotten what it was like to drink like a girl. overall, a fantastically colorful night filled with laughter, inebriation, Menthols, "i fuckin' love you"s, and flashing lights. :)dang, the trip to CVS for Pepcid AC totally paid off. i did not get red at all. maybe slightly pink, but nothing more. that made me very excited everytime i went to the bathroom to pee. i'm so down.
Marky's mom passed away yesterday.when i found out, i couldn't contain a single thought in my head. all i could feel was worry and shock. nobody saw it coming. i'd thought the worst was over. i can't speak for him. because no matter how unfortunate this all is and how sad it has made me feel, i can never fully understand. all we can do now is to be there for Mark and respect any time he may need to recuperate. it will take some time, but time heals everything. my memory of her is nothing but pleasant. she made me laugh so much even though she was in such physical and mental anguish. but now, she's in a better place. nay, the best place :) she fought for a good while, but God has decided to relieve her of her pain and grant her eternal life in His palace. she finally gets to rest. she can run around now and eat anything she wants, and i bet she's enjoying it. time to be strong and look to places that will lead to happiness, comfort, and serenity. after all, what are friends for? sleepovers & movie nights don't sound so bad, right? love is a powerful thing.
last night was very reminiscent of the good old days.
David was next door, as always, so we decided to drive to two closed Wendy's. HA! Patrick was there too, of course, just like old times. :) i rather missed that life, just driving around aimlessly, sometimes drinking and smoking, but always talking about everything and throwing out sick ideas. dang, we talked about getting Disneyland annual passes and going there every week on shrooms or ganj. hahahaha it's the greatest idea ever. and it's also tempting. $260 isn't even expensive for the 315-days one. deterrents: 1.) the drive & high gas prices. 2.) fuckin' strollers. 3.) lines & crowds... despite all that, it's still totally worth it and i'm so down :)i want to paint my room. yessums!our office is getting re-painted everywhere and it looks so fun that i want to do it too. plus, my walls have gotten pretty dirty over the years. oh, darn my dirty little hands.no deep thoughts today.i'm starting this thing where i don't waste time thinking and making theories about people who aren't worth a damn minute of my life.:)
